Do you cry, if you witness a person’s suffering? In addition, feel the pain when a friend is in distress? With such emotions, many people get a feeling of contentment.
They have a notion that the ability to feel for others is like living a life of enlightenment. However, while experiencing these emotions we often tag them as compassion or empathy.
Even though they sound similar both these emotions are different from each other. In fact, it is compassion vs. empathy! Wonder how? Keep reading to find out more about these contrasting emotions.
Compassion vs Empathy — The Quick Answer
Empathy is feeling with someone — sensing and sharing their emotions as if you were in their shoes. Compassion goes one step further: you feel for them and want to do something to ease their suffering. In short, empathy is about understanding and sharing a feeling, while compassion is empathy plus the motivation to help.
A useful way to remember the difference between compassion and empathy: empathy says “I feel your pain,” compassion says “I see your pain — how can I help?”
Compassion vs Empathy Infographics
What is compassion?
The word comes from the Late Latin compassio, from compati, meaning ‘to suffer with’. So, compassion starts with feeling for someone, much like empathy. But when a person feels compassion, he/she also desires to take action.
They feel the pain of the sufferer. He/she places themselves in another person’s position while desiring to achieve more.
In fact, the feelings of a compassionate person are so strong that they are compelled to take action. Besides, he/she cannot withstand someone else struggling with life. They provide comfort, support and take action for a positive outcome.
For instance, if there is a distressed student who is unable to pay college fees. Then the compassionate person will comfort the student. As an act of compassion, he/she will lend the money to the student and will ask to repay the loan later!
TIP
Practicing compassion helps in many ways. A study states that compassion helps in boosting happiness and self-esteem. Besides, it does not lead to fatigue!
What is empathy?
Empathy is all about getting into someone else’s shoes. When you see someone in pain, you start feeling the same in your body. You start imagining yourself in that particular situation. Also, you develop the same emotions that the sufferer is facing.
An empathetic person doesn’t need to go through the same situation or events. Yet he/she has the ability to imagine, what the sufferer must be going through. And all this happens because of mirror neurons.
But when a person is feeling empathetic, he/she does not take any actions to control their emotions. Rather they do not take steps to ease the emotions of the person they are feeling empathetic for!
For instance, if a person with empathy sees a beggar on the road. He will understand what situation the beggar is going through. The empathetic person might also remember his/her hardships. But won’t take any action further.
NOTE
Many misunderstand sympathy and empathy are similar. But they are not. When a person is sympathetic, he/she cares and understands the sufferings of others. But empathy is beyond sympathy.
Empathy means you actually share the other person’s feelings, even if you have never been in their situation. A sympathetic person, on the other hand, feels sorry for them from a distance without necessarily feeling what they feel.
Compassion vs Empathy
To compare empathy and compassion, research was undertaken. Neuroscientists Tania Singer and Olga Klimecki led this research. For their experiment, they divided participants into two groups.
One group trained in empathy and the other in compassion. And their research unearthed some fascinating differences in the regions of the brain.
a. Findings related to empathy
This group activated the insula and anterior cingulate cortex. Insula has a link between emotion and self-awareness. And anterior cingulate cortex to emotion, pain registering, and consciousness.
b. Findings related to compassion
This group activated the medial orbitofrontal cortex and ventral striatum. The medial orbitofrontal cortex has a link with reward in decision-making and learning. While the ventral striatum is also linked to the reward system.
Traits found in both groups
1. Empathy
This group found it stressful and felt discomfort. They tagged empathy as troublesome and uncomfortable.
2. Compassion
While this group had more inclination towards positivity. They had positivity in decision-making, learning, and rewards. Besides, they started having a feeling of kindness. They showed a willingness to help participants from the empathy group.
NOTE
Though this study reflects how compassion is better than empathy. Yet empathy has its positive side too. There are many benefits of empathy wherein it is a boon for various businesses.
Compassion vs Empathy Difference
| Compassion vs Empathy | Compassion | Empathy |
| Definition | Sympathetic feeling and concern for a person who is suffering | An ability to understand and feel exactly what the other person is suffering |
| Feelings evoked | A feeling of pity, concern, and sympathy | A feeling of understanding |
| Actions Taken | Implies that the compassionate person will help | Doesn’t mean that an empathetic person will help |
| Type of feelings evoked | Positive feelings like love | Mostly negative like stress |
| Common replies | “I see your pain. Please let me know how can I help?” | “I understand and see your pain” |
Compassion vs Empathy vs Sympathy
Sympathy often gets mixed into the compassion vs empathy debate. Here is how the three compare side by side:
| Sympathy | Empathy | Compassion | |
|---|---|---|---|
| What it is | Feeling sorry for someone | Feeling what someone else feels | Feeling for someone and wanting to help |
| Distance | You stay outside their experience | You step into their experience | You step in, then act |
| Typical words | “I’m so sorry that happened.” | “That sounds really painful — I can feel how hard this is.” | “That sounds really hard. Can I bring you dinner tonight?” |
| Leads to action? | Rarely | Not necessarily | Yes, by definition |
| Risk | Can feel distant or pitying | Can lead to empathic distress | More sustainable over time |
Compassionate vs Empathetic — How to Tell Them Apart
People often ask whether they are compassionate or empathetic. Most of us are a mix of both, but the two traits show up differently in everyday behavior.
Signs you are empathetic
- You pick up on other people’s moods quickly, sometimes before they say anything.
- Sad scenes in films or the news affect you physically — a lump in your throat, a heavy chest.
- You find crowded or tense rooms draining because you absorb the emotions around you.
- Friends say you “just get it” when they explain how they feel.
- After supporting someone, you can feel exhausted, as if their problem became yours.
Signs you are compassionate
- When someone is struggling, your first thought is “What would actually help?”
- You offer practical support — a meal, a lift, an hour of your time — not just kind words.
- You can stay calm and steady around someone in distress instead of being overwhelmed.
- You extend the same understanding to yourself when you make mistakes.
- You help even when you don’t personally relate to the person’s situation.
Being empathetic is a valuable starting point. Being compassionate is what turns that understanding into care that lasts. Building your broader emotional intelligence helps you move between the two.
What Is Compassionate Empathy?
Psychologists Paul Ekman and Daniel Goleman describe three kinds of empathy, and the third one, compassionate empathy, is where empathy and compassion meet:
- Cognitive empathy — understanding what another person is thinking or feeling, like perspective-taking.
- Emotional (affective) empathy — actually feeling what the other person feels.
- Compassionate empathy (empathic concern) — understanding and feeling for someone, and being moved to help.
Compassionate empathy is often seen as the healthiest balance. You stay connected to the other person’s feelings without being swept away by them, and you channel that connection into something useful.
Compassion vs Empathy Examples
The difference is easiest to see in real situations:
| Situation | Empathy | Compassion |
|---|---|---|
| A friend loses their job | You feel their anxiety and worry about the future with them. | You listen, then offer to review their CV or share job leads. |
| A colleague is grieving | You feel a wave of sadness when they talk about their loss. | You cover a shift for them or check in with a message next week. |
| Your child fails a test | You feel their disappointment and embarrassment. | You comfort them, then help them plan how to prepare next time. |
| You make a mistake at work | — | Self-compassion: you acknowledge the error, forgive yourself and fix it. |
Notice that compassion doesn’t replace empathy — it builds on it. Without some empathy, it’s hard to know what kind of help a person actually needs.
How to deal with empathic distress?
SUMMARY
The research suggested that participants trained in empathy found it troublesome. Such situations could lead to empathetic distress.
Furthermore, resulting in negative feelings, poor health, or even burnout. But there are ways in which this situation is controllable!
1. Take a break
When you see someone distressed but cannot be at their side. Then it’s better to take a break! Take a deep breath and question yourself about the feelings going on in your head.
Thinking about the things that you need right now. Keep a check on yourself first. Because if you get caught in distress, then you won’t be able to help anyone around you!
2. Question yourself
Start questioning yourself when triggered by distressful events.
- What triggered me?
- What am I thinking?
- What am I imagining?
- What action should I take?
- Is the person genuine and telling the truth?
With questioning, you will be able to structure your thinking. Your perspective will change. You will be able to tone down the stressful feelings. Once you achieve this, you will be able to cater to the needs of others thoughtfully.
3. Practice compassion
As mentioned, compassion exhibits concern for another person. Also, it helps in alleviating that suffering. A compassionate person can easily communicate with a person with love and kindness.
Besides, you may also join a Compassion Training program that will help you boost resilience. And help you stay connected with others in a positive way.
Tips on how to become compassionate
1. Don’t be judgmental
It is difficult to guess the factors that led to the disheartening state of a person. So, it’s best to not pass any judgment. Instead, think about the hardships of life and how every person is struggling to get the best out of it.
Besides, don’t tag any decision as right or wrong and good or bad. Instead, keep yourself in someone else’s shoes. It will help you practice empathy and understand the person better.
2. Be a good listener
Several times, we stop a person from talking and start building our assumptions. But as an act of compassion, listen carefully to what the other person has to say! Let him/her pour their heart out.
If you listen with an open heart, the person might find solutions. Alongside this, he/she will accept the truth about themselves.
3. Practice kindness to yourself
We tend to demean ourselves more often. Instead, remember that humans are born with flaws. We all make mistakes and learn from them. So, self-loathing will help you in no way. Instead, forgive yourself and move on in life with a positive attitude.
4. Be present and attentive
Try to be attentive whenever you meet any person. Also, avoid multitasking, mobile browsing, or watching TV. In addition, maintain eye contact and positive body language. Because with attentiveness, you will be able to feel the person’s emotions in a better way. And considered as an act of compassion.
TIP
Along with this, you may also practice loving-kindness meditation. It is a great practice to infuse more compassion into your heart.
Compassion vs Empathy — FAQs
What is the main difference between compassion and empathy?
Empathy is sharing and understanding someone else’s feelings. Compassion includes that understanding but adds a desire to relieve the person’s suffering, which usually leads to some kind of action.
Which is better, compassion or empathy?
Neither is “better” on its own — empathy helps you understand people, and compassion helps you support them. Research by Tania Singer and Olga Klimecki suggests compassion is more sustainable, because pure empathy can turn into empathic distress when you are exposed to a lot of suffering.
Can you be compassionate without being empathetic?
To a degree, yes. You can choose to help someone kindly even when you don’t personally feel what they feel. But some empathy usually makes compassion more accurate, because it helps you understand what the person really needs.
What does compassion mean in simple words?
Compassion means noticing someone’s pain, caring about it, and wanting to help. The word literally means “to suffer with.”
Is sympathy the same as empathy or compassion?
No. Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone from the outside. Empathy is feeling what they feel, and compassion is feeling for them and wanting to help.
Can too much empathy be bad for you?
It can. Constantly absorbing other people’s pain may lead to stress, compassion fatigue or burnout, especially in caregiving roles. Taking breaks, setting boundaries and practicing compassion and self-compassion can help.
Closing thoughts
Though they sound similar, it might get difficult to understand compassion vs. empathy. If empathy helps in connecting, then compassion helps in taking appropriate action. Both are interconnected in their way but are helpful in many ways!
More compassionate mind, more sense of concern for other’s well-being, is a source of happiness.
— Dalai Lama
Article Sources
1. https://www.betterup.com/blog/compassion-vs-empathy
2. https://www.tonyrobbins.com/mind-meaning/compassion-vs-empathy/
3. https://www.mentalhelp.net/blogs/compassion-vs-empathy/
