All of us have experienced moments of intense pressure or stress in our daily lives. Worrying and being upset is a normal thing, Right?
But what if this stress and anxiety robs your happiness and peace? And you are left to suffer in silence.
For this, you will have to know the various ways of How to stay calm? Sometimes life gets harsh and you are stuck in the rut of negativity. You may find it difficult to come out of your head and feel all-consuming by some external pressure.
There are several ways to train your mind to stay calm amidst all the anarchy going around.
How to stay calm
When we say ‘how to stay calm?” we are seeking ways to train ourselves to deal with people and situations that can become potential triggers for our anxiety and emotionally overwhelming behavior.
Whether you are driving through a traffic snarl, or seeking a new job, or dealing with a chronic illness in the family, there are thousands of situations that can put a mental pressure on you.
You will feel overwhelmed by your racing thoughts and constant mind chatting of how to deal with these varied troubles in life.
Dealing with issues is not as easy as said because coping is an individual art and no two people will deal with the same problem in similar ways. Neither will the problem have the same impact nor will the coping strategies be similar.
The constant worries and agonies of daily life will not allow you to come out of your heads. You may ruminate about some worst-case scenarios that will put you in a cycle of anxiety.
For this, learning the best possible ways to stay calm in daily lives have become utmost important. Handling our overwhelming emotions takes skill and patience. Emotional mastery is the key to good physical and mental health.
Whenever stress and anxiety, or even anger issues and annoyance take over your thoughts, you will feel an imbalance within yourself, as if things are not in tune to what they should be.
During these turbulent times, the key is to stay calm, poised, and absolutely blissful from the deepest core of your inner being.
But how to do it right?
In the next few sections of this article, we will highlight the various self-help strategies that can help you to stay calm in face of stress and nervousness.
How to stay calm under pressure
We all wish to live happy and healthy lives. But at times, being exposed to stressful circumstances can make you feel nervous and anxious in many different ways.
Several daily pressures such as performing best in job, doing household duties and looking after the children in the best way, or fulfilling some of the expectations of your loved ones can impose mental pressure.
In the face of pressure, you may begin to show certain panicky signs that make you feel more overwhelmed from within.
In such a situation, you can do certain things to stay calm and recharge and refresh yourself.
1. Distract yourself
Stop focusing on the thoughts that make you uncomfortable. A simple way to do this is by distracting yourself from the triggers that feel like pressure.
2. Pause and focus on only one thing at a time
Complete one task at a time. Do not think about the next work in line, otherwise the worries and fears will impact performance. You may not accomplish the task as desired. At times, take a pause or slow down to improve your attention and stay calm while accomplishing the task.
3. Do proper planning
Plan the things that you need to do in a particular timeline. This means you need to streamline your work. Following a definite order of doing things can reduce the pressure off you.
4. Avoid being a people-pleaser
Never try to please everyone around you. People will have their own expectations but you will have to learn to say a ‘no’ when you’re tired or not feeling great.
5. Mindfulness meditation
Practice mindfulness and focus just on the moment you are in. Most of the time, we feel pressured because we try to think a lot about past situations or future goals. Being in the moment adds bliss to your life.
Some of the other ways to stay calm under pressure are as follows:
- Stretching exercises can help. You may also relax your body with deep breathing exercises that take the mental pressure off you.
- Pursue a hobby that you love.
- Have some ‘me’ time to unwind and break free from the things that feel overwhelming.
- Close your eyes and start a process of slow breathing. Whenever you are feeling that your coping resources are no longer working, try doing breathing exercises to experience an instant calming process.
How to stay calm when angry
You must have experienced many annoying moments in your daily life when it was really hard to keep your temper in check.
Anger is a negative emotion. You cannot harbor a lot of anger in you; otherwise you’ll end up feeling irritated and frustrated all the time.
It’s important to tame your angry responses and stay calm in situations that trigger disgust and annoyance. You may say or do something awful and later regret the same.
Anger damages relationships. It hampers adjustment and impacts health and wellness to a great extent.
Some of the healthy ways of anger management are discussed below:
1. Do not speak in haste
When you experience anger thoughts, it’s common to say something that you might later regret. The heat of the moment leads to a restless mindset.
It makes you utter words that you would not have said otherwise. To stay calm, you will have to think before uttering words that you cannot take back again.
2. Express your concerns slowly
It is always good to show your concern or express why you’re annoyed with someone peacefully. The calmness within improves your clarity of thinking and understanding.
State your needs and wants in an assertive way. When anger takes over your inner ‘self’, you may feel fumed from inside. Calming process allows for better rationality and control over your impulsive sayings and actions.
It also stops you from hurting or controlling the other person.
3. Have some timeout
Whenever you start to feel angry, make sure to move away, escape, or just avoid the situation. Sometimes, this timeout helps in decreasing your annoyance and anger responses instantly.
Taking small breaks from stressful situations helps in lowering your anger to a great extent. This life hack also helps you to become better prepared for handling future situations peacefully without getting angry or irritated.
Move away from the immediate trigger for the time being. You will surely feel controlled and relaxed.
4. Regular workouts
Physical activity is a good way of avoiding negative emotions. If you feel that your irritation or annoyance is shooting up, try going for a brisk nature walk or head to the gym for a power packed workout. Physical exertion cools you down by improving mood.
5. Try finding out solutions to your problems that leads to anger
Instead of thinking about what made you angry, try finding out workable solutions to your problems. Also make yourself understand that certain things in life are just out of control. When you know this, you will automatically stop freaking out.
Do you have a messy child at home? Or your partner doesn’t contribute his/her share in the household. In these daily issues, try to ignore the situation for the time being or else, you can make your messy child do all the cleaning.
Be clear with your partner that they will have to take over the entire household duties over the weekend. Be calm and state your needs as clearly as possible.
6. Avoid holding grudges
The residues of grudge and resentment that accompany angry responses can harm your relationships forever. Thus, avoid holding grudges against anyone. Forgiveness is a powerful tool to stay calm when angry.
It allows the bitterness to go off forever. You will no longer get caught in negative feelings against the person and your relationships can be saved from a complete failure.
7. Use humor whenever you can
Humor has the power to nullify bitterness and frustration in a moment. When you make your moments lighter with smiles and laughter, you feel much lighter and your anger subsides easily.
8. Practice relaxation exercises
These exercises can put down anger instantly. If your temper flares up at the slightest provocation, use relaxation skills such as deep breathing exercises, drinking a glass of water, or repeat words that work for you.
At times, you can also start imagining a peaceful scene that can lower your anger immediately. Journaling your feelings and writing about the troubling thoughts that induce anger can actually make you feel better.
You can try out calming yoga poses as well to calm anger. Relaxation exercises are daily handy tools that give immediate relief from anger.
How to stay calm in stressful situations
Stress and anxiety has become a part and parcel of our daily lives. Whatever you do, you’ll always find yourself stuck in stress and anxiety.
Too much stress may cause elevated blood pressure, increased heart rate, and increasing too much stress hormones can also lead to panic attacks in turbulent times.
While most of us deal with the daily stresses quite effectively, knowing a few more self-help strategies to stay calm in stressful situations can help you overcome your overwhelming responses.
Managing stress may happen like this:
- Take regular breaks from your work so that feeling good experiences can fill your heart much easily.
- Focus on all the positive things that have happened now or in the recent past.
- Take deep breaths because it allows the body and mind to attain deeper peace and thus your body stops releasing the stress hormones that were the real culprit behind your overwhelming feelings.
- Sometimes thinking about worst case scenarios can increase your stress levels. This is also known as catastrophic thinking. Stop dwelling in your mind and feeding such thoughts. It will help in calming the stress that has built up inside you.
- Sleep well and eat healthy so that the body’s immune system stays fit and fine. A healthy and stress-free mind can only dwell in a healthy body.
- Regular exercise, yoga, or nature’s walk helps you to stay calm in stressful situations.
- Meditation or mindfulness practice where you will focus all your senses in the present moment can help in reducing stress.
- Practice gratitude and be happy for whatever you have in your life. Embrace the tiny achievements and feel special about yourself. After all, anxiety can be tamed only if you consciously choose to stay calm and serene.
- Staying calm in moments of stress is also possible by regularly practicing a hobby, playing a musical instrument, listening to bestselling tunes, etc. These regular practices soothe your inner being and make you feel more controlled when stuck in stress.
- You can train your brain to stay calm always in moments of stress. This is a conscious practice that you will have to do every day so that you can master all your negative emotions in the best possible ways.
- Always surround yourself with positive people who can emanate positive vibes and help you stay calm.
How to stay calm at work
Your attitude towards work that you do and the way you control your emotions play a vital role in work related success.
In workplaces, staying calm can be tricky because your responses and behavior are influenced by people who work with you.
But if you practice consciously to stay calm and focused no matter whatever problems may come your way, then your job is almost half done.
Sometimes staying calm in workplaces is of utmost importance. This is because a relaxed and positive state of mind is needed for the overall growth of the organization.
Some of these ways are enumerated below:
- Avoid multitasking and jumping from one work to the other. Remember your quality of work matters more than the quantity. So, just stop pressuring yourself with unnecessary expectations of accomplishing all tasks in one go.
- Positive attitude also influences your outlook towards work. In the face of stress, it’s not uncommon to lose self-confidence. You may lose trust in your abilities and thus feel stressed out at work. With a focused and positive approach, you’ll feel in control of your negativity.
- You can also remain calm by giving some responsibilities of the work to other team members. This will take the workload off you and will make you feel relaxed and easy.
- Take regular breaks from your work. This will calm down your overwhelming responses. Mental uneasiness can be controlled by removing yourself from the source of stress.
- Make a plan so that your day schedule gets fixed much before the day starts. Be organized and keep stress at bay.
- Ensure that you have one or two workplace buddies who can help you out in times of need. If you get stuck in a decision making process, seek their support to sort out things in a methodical way. Your buddy could be a person from the same team, or any other colleague with whom you share a close connection.
- Remain flexible and open-minded as far as your work is concerned. There would be situations when things will not fall in place as per your wishes. In those times, be calm and accept what’s real.
- Stop over expecting too much from yourself. If you are not feeling great, stop the work that you were doing immediately.
- Prioritize your work. Not all work carries equal significance. So, do not waste time in doing tasks that can wait for some other time. Just focus on the tasks that need to be completed now. This will take the pressure off you.
How to stay calm during an argument
There are times in our lives when things do not work out as expected. We may get caught in unnecessary arguments with friends or family members, and even with unknown people.
Arguments happen because your opinion is not the same as the other person, and both parties try to prove their point of view as worthy.
During arguments, there are constant fault finding, abusing, and verbal abuses that can make the discussion a heated one in no time.
It is very essential to remain calm and poised when things are unsettling. One party has to compromise and take the path of poise and serenity, otherwise anger and disappointments can break relationships forever.
1. Stay mindful
Most arguments take place because of misunderstandings and mishaps in effective communication. When you’re annoyed with someone, you will always try to prove yourself right and may say or do certain things that you may regret overtime.
Thus, be mindful of what is being said, or done, and what the issue in hand actually calls for. Being mindful allows for rational awareness so that you can mind your words and put a check on your behavior if needed.
Try to communicate your opinions and concerns clearly, humbly, and softly without getting agitated. Have a compassionate tone rather than getting into a direct verbal attack on someone.
2. Check in with yourself always
Most arguments take place because of miscommunication. Thus, check in with yourself whether you have really understood the issue in hand. If not, self-introspect and try to find out the loopholes in your understanding. Don’t harbor miscommunications and call for a decision making that can benefit both parties.
3. Manage your emotions
You need to manage your emotions well in an argument. If you feel heated up, take a pause; think internally before making any response. In a way, you need to have good emotional intelligence to deal with arguments in daily lives.
Sometimes overwhelming emotions take over our ability to think logically and we may say or do certain things that we may regret later on.
4. Pay attention to how you speak
Whenever an argument takes place, people have a natural urge to prove them correct. Thus, they try to overpower the other person with their harsh opinions and unkind words. This escalates a further argument that is never going to stop.
Thus, you need to be careful with the words you choose, and the way you speak to the other person. Even if you know that what the other person is saying is absolute trash, be humble and keep your voice under control.
If you raise your voice, the other person feels threatened and will backfire immediately. By paying attention to your choice of words, you can check the argument completely.
5. Remove yourself from the situation
It’s always a wise choice to move away from the heated discussions for the time being. Later on, when both parties feel serene, they can start again by using more rationality and logic into the matter in hand.
The idea is to get into a space that allows processing all your negative emotions in a better way. You will be able to think about the details of the matter more vividly.
Remember, arguments are not about winning or losing the battle but it’s about resolving the conflict or issue in hand as tactfully and peacefully as possible.
How to stay calm in front of your crush
Feeling nervous and tongue-tied in front of your crush is nothing uncommon. You are not feeling confident about how to start a conversation or how to express yourself better so that they like you, etc.
If you want to behave cool in front of your crush, you can use one or more of the following tips to grab their attention towards you.
- Just be who you are. Do not pretend to be someone else to fit your crush’s expectations.
- Remember that your crush is just another human with many flaws and deficits. So, you need not freak out if you feel you are not adequate.
- Do not be too showy when it comes to expressing your feelings towards them. Make sure that you keep your conversation sweet and simple.
- Never be a people-pleaser in front of your crush. You should stay comfortable in your own skin.
- Do not praise them for everything they say or do because it will look fake and showy. This behavior will not show your genuine feelings for them.
- Avoid second guessing if you later realize about some silly things that you have said or done.
- Practice active listening and do not just start talking or giving opinions that you may regret later on.
- Never show you’re anxious about the present or future goals of the relationship. Just move with the flow of time and see if the relationship works well for you.
How to stay calm when anxious
We all get upset due to endless reasons in our daily life, but does it mean that we worry as well. Being upset at times is nothing uncommon. Getting caught in a traffic snarl may make you upset and jittery.
The late night arrival of your partner may rob your inner peace. Even the small child’s messy behavior can irritate you in no time. Thus, you may feel anxious or worry about many known and unknown issues.
This heightened and fearful state of mind exhausts you and you seek some sort of immediate relief from such anxiousness.
So, let’s find out what you can do to stay calm when anxious:
- Breathe deeply to reduce anger or any other stress that has built in you. Your anxious mind will slowly calm down as well as the feelings related with the disturbing thoughts.
- Accept your anxious thoughts and do not avoid them. Embrace your genuine feelings of anxiety as real and genuine. When you do this, your mind starts developing awareness and clarity and hunts out the reasons for this anxiety.
- Behind every anxious thought, it’s your negative mindset that plays a vital role. As you are focusing only on the negative side of things, you are imagining worst –case situations, thus a spiral of more anxiety sets in. focus on the positive side of the situation and ask yourself “is it really bad?”
- Retreat in a quiet corner and visualize yourself as calm and poised.
- Follow the 54321 grounding method and focus all the 5 senses in experiencing something pleasurable around you. This method calms down your racing thoughts and agitated mindset.
- Practice regular mediation to experience deeper calmness.
- Art therapy can be a good choice to reduce your anxiety. You can just draw the things that make you anxious. Draw free hand cartoons or memes that are funny and can lighten your bad mood instantly.
- You can listen to good music or dance it out if feeling too anxious about a particular thing in your daily life. This is catharsis and a healthy expression of your negative emotions.
- Stress buster toys such as smiley balls, fidget spinner, sculpting clay, or Rubik’s cube can release your anxiety. These things relieve anxious thoughts by reframing your focus on some productive things.
- Consult a mental health professional if your anxious symptoms persist for a long time and seem to interfere with your daily life.
Summing Up from ‘ThePleasantMind’
When you have learnt to master your emotions in the best possible ways, you can consider yourself an empowered being.
Staying calm amidst chaos is not as easy as it may sound. It takes years of practice and patience to deal with situations in a calm and peaceful manner.
After all, we humans are wired to lose patience even with slightest provocations from our immediate surroundings. The trick to stay calm is subjective and can vary from one person to another in many specific ways.
A Psychologist with a master's degree in Psychology, a former school psychologist, and a teacher by profession Chandrani loves to live life simply and happily. She is an avid reader and a keen observer. Writing has always been a passion for her, since her school days. It helps to de-stress and keeps her mentally agile. Pursuing a career in writing was a chance occurrence when she started to pen down her thoughts and experiences for a few childcare and parenting websites. Her lovable niche includes mental health, parenting, childcare, and self-improvement. She is here to share her thoughts and experiences and enrich the lives of few if not many.